Empathy is the Next Human Evolution

“What might we see, how might we act, if  we saw with a webbed vision?The world seen through a web of relationships…as delicate as spider’s silk,yet strong enough to hang a bridge on.”

Catherine Keller,  From a Broken Web

Here is something  I believe is at the heart of what the archetype of  Spider Woman means to me, what Her evolutionary work (remember the many Pueblo  legends of Spider Woman being the "Midwife" of each new age?  I wrote a bit about this on the advent of 2012).  In these sacred stories of the birth of each age, and the ending of the old age, it is Spider Woman who leads the people through the Kiva, or birth canal, into the new world. 

Spider Woman, the great Weaver, weaving the world with the stories that She tells, casting a thread to the new people, a thread of the great Web that resonates with every other thread.

I like to think that the Internet is Her latest appearance.  

Photo by J.J. Idarius

“Hope now lies in moving beyond our past in order to build together a sustainable future for all the interwoven and interdependent life on our planet, including the human element.

We will have to evolve now into a truly compassionate and tolerant world – because for the first time since the little tribes of humanity’s infancy, everyone’s well being is once again linked with cooperation for survival.  Our circle will have to include the entire world.”

Joel Kramer and Diana Alstad,

from The Guru Papers

As  I think about how I and friends and colleagues are going to the World Parliment on Religion in Salt Lake City this October (thanks to Macha Nightmare), it seems to me that Grandmother Spider Woman is a deity who should, and will, be there, although perhaps little spoken of.  But as so many have said so much more eloquently than I, the new and ancient  theology for a global civilization facing a global crisis must ultimately be a theology of holy  inter-dependancy. 

Interconnectedness, Spiritual Ecology, quontum entanglement.  And I also believe there is a profound need for new forms of spiritual iconography and meaningful  ritual  that reflects that paradigm of ultimate unity...........work for artists of all kinds. 

 

"What is the new mythology to be, the mythology of this unified earth as of one harmonious being?"

 Joseph Campbell, from "The Power of Myth" (with Bill Moyers)

To me Spider Woman is also about synchronicity, that vast, mysterious, and sometimes funny as well,  Web of Being that underlies our lives.  So interestingly, as I was contemplating all of this, along with practical matters like hotels, I received an interesting email from Trish  and Rob Macgregor, a writer team exploring Synchronicity (among many other things) whose Blog I often visit for its wise, and often surprising, articles.  Trish and Rob are working on an article about "planetary empaths", and wanted to know what I and others thought the world might be like in 15 years or so, if we had any impressions.  There's a bit of  Spider Woman forcing me to stop and think, and I copy how I responded to their question below. 

I'd like to explore this idea much more in the future, because I think it really is important.......

Hi Trish,

Funny, I've been reading a lot of articles lately on empathy (came up on Facebook), and the word keeps turning up, including my own recent article.  

I think strongly that the next human evolution is not intellectual, or technological, or even cultural - it's empathic.  We feel ourselves connected to each other and to the planet in its diversity. Understanding and maturing this process would create entirely different kinds of appropriate human societies.  This idea ("the next human evolution is one of empathy") is a thought that keeps coming into my mind for the past few years, and lately I've been seeing it discussed in different contexts, so I am not alone in this idea arising into the collective consciousness.  

 And I don't think empathy is the same as "telepathy" - empathy is the emotional body, and evolution of empathy means helping the emotional body or emotional mind, individually and collectively, to mature, be discerning (because being an empath means you take on every one's stuff, and often don't know where it's coming from, or you think it is you, or you just get sick)......and find a different kind of  language for perception, healing, and energy exchange, one that is based on a fundamental understanding, emotional understanding, of deep interconnection.  

So having written that...........I think that those seeds of change, and many individuals who are highly empathic, are here, trying to germinate, especially in response to the pain and crisis of the planet.  

But taking root.............I strongly feel that such ideas and groups and individuals as well will need to be in small communities, possibly alternative communities of various kinds, certainly they will need support groups............because  they will have a hard time surviving in the face of all the conflict and confusion (and violence) that I am certain is coming.  Our civilization is not sustainable, nor is our economic system, and all kinds of reactionary forces (Republicans, right wing patriarchs, fundamentalist religions, and all kinds of racial scapegoating as people look for someone to blame) will continue to arise as times become more difficult, and resources more limited.  

And yet..........I have a real sense of, well, hope?  I see all kinds of good things happening that you won't hear on Fox news.  I almost feel that empaths are a response to our need for planetary evolution - they arise from a greater purpose, perhaps, from the mind of Gaia.  

Does that make sense?  Thanks for asking me the question..................

" The new myth coming into being through the triple influence of quantum physics, depth psychology and the ecological movement suggests that we are participants in a great cosmic web of life, each one of us indissolubly connected with all others through that invisible field.   It is the most insidious of illusions to think that we can achieve a position of dominance in relation to nature, life or each other. In our essence, we are one."

Anne Baring

Empaths and Energy Theft Revisited

Synchronistically, I received a comment from someone (below) addressed to a post I wrote back in 2011 about Empaths and Energy protection. It moved me to re-post the article, realizing that I need to read it again myself.  I'm looking forward to the chance to be alone this summer, and to replenish my energies and revive my creativity.  I have always pretty much known I'm an empath.  

"How do you deal with those who are energetically parasitic? It seems like you and a couple other sources, seem to defend people who make choices to take on a victim mentality, and use manipulative tactics to steal energy and attention. I agree these people obviously lack love, but to some extent they need to realize that and take necessary steps towards healing, and emotional maturity...like people like us chose to do. Hard to support their habits...hard to understand why we support their victim mentality drain....please explain. Much love to you."

May 4, 2015 

I don't feel I defend people who take on a victim mentality or exhaust the life force of others by  any means.........when I can, I try to avoid them.  That's not always possible - in family situations, caretaker situations, and many other circumstances we are often thrown into contact with people who drain the life out of you.  I have  a family member who is a drug addict, for example.   Our society in general may have aspects to it that actively support "psychic vampirism"........ certainly rampant capitalism and consumerism is about exploitation, opportunism, addiction and manipulation.  All forms, in my opinion, of "vampirism".

But  I do believe that most people are unconscious of their motives, drives, attractions, or even needs.   Self-awareness requires work, breaking old familial patterns requires effort, and sometimes to break those patterns requires a fair amount of education and the help of good therapy, as well as seeing through social patterns that often support negative behavior in order to come to terms with one's "shadow side".  No one wants to admit that they are draining others, that they are dependant on others attention and energy, that they don't care about the well being of another as long as they are being "fed", that they are manipulating others, that they are destructive because of jealousy, addiction, etc.

The ability to change, to mature into real conscience and self sufficiency.........is actually something only exceptional people are able to do. 

I know that sounds harsh, but I am tending to feel that the drift of our culture is increasingly away from self-examination, conscience, and empathy.  The "disposibility" of our world has made that so.  How else can such a vast population be uninterested in climate change, in the loss of endless species, in the destruction that future generations much live with?  This is true in social relations as well.

As far as the energy draining "victim stance", I think also that is also often  socially condoned.  And of course it's necessary to make a distinction between people who are genuinely victimized by circumstances and in genuine  need of healing and empowerment.

I'm talking about people who are  "vampires" because of their unconcious dedication to seeing themselves as "victims".  Which can not only be a ploy for exploiting the energy reserves of others, but  is also somewhat socially accepted.  If you are a "victim" you don't need to take responsibility for what you do or what happens to you, because it's "not your fault".  Such people remain dependant children, unable to move forward - but they rarely are able to understand that process.  You can get a lot of mileage from others by being a "victim", and you can also belong to victim social clubs that reinforce the sanctity of your eternally wounded position.  If someone rejects you, it's because they are "unkind" and lack empathy.........and empaths are the best source of energy!

http://threadsofspiderwoman.blogspot.com/2011/10/intuitive-empaths-energy-theft.html

Friday, October 28, 2011

Intuitive Empaths and Energy Theft

 I've come to believe, experientially  more than conceptually,  that mind is more than the physical body and brain, and that we are far more connected with each other, and our planet,  than we can personally imagine. We are  very permeable, indeed we have to be so, because we are constantly exchanging life force with the planet and everyone who has ever lived with every breath we take; exchanging energy and information with each step we take and every word we utter. The exchange and negotiation of energy is the fundamental dance of life. 

Most people value empathy, the ability to sense and often emotionally experience, or resonate with, what others are feeling.   Empathic individuals are usually compassionate people, sensitives who often become healers, teachers, and profound listeners.  Highly empathic people have excellent "antennas" - if they have experience and discernment, they can scan the emotional and psychic environment  and determine what is going on beneath the surface.  If they don't, they can  absorb energy that is not their own unwittingly.   

I believe this skill of discernment takes time to mature, and an empathic child or unskilled person can often become overwhelmed.  Because being empathic can also be detrimental, overwhelming, and even life threatening, and is one of the reasons sensitive people often become alcoholics or recluses in order to "tune out the noise".  Highly empathic people, what Dr. Judith Orloff calls "intuitive empaths", can be like velcro - everything sticks to them.  

People are always discharging emotional energy. Children scream in anger, cry in frustration, and laugh with pleasure when their needs are met, and so do adults, if not always as obviously. Sometimes it's absolutely necessary to tell our stories, to have our pain witnessed by compassionate others in order to change, to "fore-give", to let go of the trauma and move fore-ward in our lives.  But some people have become addicted to dumping negative emotional energy on others, and they can leave an empathic individual drained, or feeling scattered and crazy from absorbing their energy.  This can be true of collective energies as well. 

I don't like the term "psychic vampires" because of its judgemental terminology.  It implies that dreadful, inhuman people are stalking the streets, ready to suck up all of your lifeforce, when the fact is, most of us have at various times in our lives been draining or exhausting.    Sometimes people are energy draining because they are, in Buddhist terms, unskillful in their understanding of how to manage their own energy systems, in how to manage their thoughts and social interactions in other words.  Many people are energetically exhausting because they have become addicted to complaining, or have adopted a "victim" life stance, which can be addictive as well as socially supported.   Carolyn Myss spoke about what she called a "culture of woundology" as a related issue.   

Some people have learned, as children, negative ways of achieving attention, which is a form of energy theft if it's not willingly given.  I had an acquaintance I worked with who could be absolutely relentless in demanding attention, to the point where otherwise calm, poised people would "lose it" around him.  Including me.........one day I found myself screaming at him at the top of my lungs.  It was at that moment I noticed he was smiling blissfully - and I painfully saw, briefly,  a small child who had found the only way he knew to get attention. 

And many people are just plain worn out, ill, grieving, troubled by misfortune,  or elderly, and haven't got a lot of personal energy.  That doesn't make them "vampires".  That often makes them people in need of a little understanding and kindness.

True psychic vampires, I believe, are rare.  About 10 years ago, I broke my leg, and was confined to a wheelchair for 4 months.  It happened that I was offered a couch in a friends studio, which was in a lovely complex that had other studios, a few shops, and a chiropractor's office, so people were always coming and going, which I enjoyed.  But because so much of my energy was going into mending my broken bones, and I often felt weak, I became quite sensitive to how interactions with others affected me.  Some people were like bright lights - I felt enlivened when they entered the room.  Most were neutral.  But there was one woman I'll never forget.   Although she was a fascinating woman, who ironically was a practicing psychic, every time she came by  I'd be flat on my back afterwards, sometimes all day.   I don't know if I would have realized her "vampire" effect so clearly, had I not been in a sensitive lowered energy state because of my recovery.   What made her like that?  I can't possibly know, although I would bet it arises from some kind of traumatic childhood. 

So once again thanks to my friend Charlie Spillar for a great video by Dr. Judith Orloff.

Judith Orloff MD, an Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at UCLA and intuition expert, is author of the New York Times Bestseller Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life (Three Rivers Press, 2011) Her other bestsellers are Positive Energy, Intuitive Healing, and Second Sight. Dr. Orloff synthesizes traditional medicine with cutting edge  energy medicine.  Her website is:  www.drjudithorloff.com

https://youtu.be/Oyap0KBouP0

Intuitive Empaths & Energy Theft

 I've come to believe, experientially  more than conceptually,  that mind is more than the physical body and brain, and that we are far more connected with each other, and our planet,  than we can personally imagine. We are  very permeable, indeed we have to be so, because we are constantly exchanging life force with the planet and everyone who has ever lived with every breath we take; exchanging energy and information with each step we take and every word we utter. The exchange and negotiation of energy is the fundamental dance of life.

Most people value empathy, the ability to sense and often emotionally experience, or resonate with, what others are feeling.   Empathic individuals are usually compassionate people, sensitives who often become healers, teachers, and profound listeners.  Highly empathic people have excellent "antennas" - if they have experience and discernment, they can scan the emotional and psychic environment  and determine what is going on beneath the surface.  If they don't, they can  absorb energy that is not their own unwittingly.   I believe this skill of discernment takes time to mature, and an empathic child or unskilled person can often become overwhelmed.  Because being empathic can also be detrimental, overwhelming, and even life threatening, and is one of the reasons sensitive people often become alcoholics or recluses in order to "tune out the noise".  Highly empathic people, what Dr. Judith Orloff calls "intuitive empaths", can be like velcro - everything sticks to them.  

People are always discharging emotional energy. Children scream in anger, cry in frustration, and laugh with pleasure when their needs are met, and so do adults, if not always as obviously. Sometimes it's absolutely necessary to tell our stories, to have our pain witnessed by compassionate others in order to change, to "fore-give", to let go of the trauma and move fore-ward in our lives.  But some people have become addicted to dumping negative emotional energy on others, and they can leave an empathic individual drained, or feeling scattered and crazy from absorbing their energy.  This can be true of collective energies as well. 

I don't like the term "psychic vampires" because of its judgemental terminology.  It implies that dreadful, inhuman people are stalking the streets, ready to suck up all of your lifeforce, when the fact is, most of us have at various times in our lives been draining or exhausting.    Sometimes people are energy draining because they are, in Buddhist terms, unskillful in their understanding of how to manage their own energy systems, in how to manage their thoughts and social interactions in other words.  Many people are energetically exhausting because they have become addicted to complaining, or have adopted a "victim" life stance, which can be addictive as well as socially supported.   Carolyn Myss spoke about what she called a "culture of woundology" as a related issue.   

Some people have learned, as children, negative ways of achieving attention, which is a form of energy theft if it's not willingly given.  I had an acquaintance I worked with who could be absolutely relentless in demanding attention, to the point where otherwise calm, poised people would "lose it" around him.  Including me.........one day I found myself screaming at him at the top of my lungs.  It was at that moment I noticed he was smiling blissfully - and I painfully saw, briefly,  a small child who had found the only way he knew to get attention. 

And many people are just plain worn out, ill, grieving, troubled by misfortune,  or elderly, and haven't got a lot of personal energy.  That doesn't make them "vampires".  That often makes them people in need of a little understanding and kindness.

True psychic vampires, I believe, are rare.  About 10 years ago, I broke my leg, and was confined to a wheelchair for 4 months.  It happened that I was offered a couch in a friends studio, which was in a lovely complex that had other studios, a few shops, and a chiropractor's office, so people were always coming and going, which I enjoyed.  But because so much of my energy was going into mending my broken bones, and I often felt weak, I became quite sensitive to how interactions with others affected me.  Some people were like bright lights - I felt enlivened when they entered the room.  Most were neutral.  But there was one woman I'll never forget.   Although she was a fascinating woman, who ironically was a practicing psychic, every time she came by  I'd be flat on my back afterwards, sometimes all day.   I don't know if I would have realized her "vampire" effect so clearly, had I not been in a sensitive lowered energy state because of my recovery.   What made her like that?  I can't possibly know, although I would bet it arises from some kind of traumatic childhood. 

So once again thanks to my friend Charlie Spillar for a great video by Dr. Judith Orloff.

Judith Orloff MD, an Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at UCLA and intuition expert, is author of the New York Times Bestseller Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life (Three Rivers Press, 2011) Her other bestsellers are Positive Energy, Intuitive Healing, and Second Sight. Dr. Orloff synthesizes traditional medicine with cutting edge  energy medicine.  Her website is:  www.drjudithorloff.com